Already and Not Yet

Waiting in the Space Between

I looked out the window of our sunroom into the back yard on a lovely spring evening. The garden-like setting of leafing trees, lazy river in the backdrop, flowers-in-the-making, and birds in brilliant color made me ponder the season of Easter. I intended to ponder Pentecost and ended up being reminded of the resurrection and this seemingly lengthy period between the already, Christ’s re-appearance after death and burial, and the not yet, his disciples’ anointing with Holy Spirit.

I wonder if the season of that first  Easter, had they followed a Church calendar then, would have seemed as long to them as this Easter season seemed to me. So much took place after Resurrection Sunday 2024 before Pentecost Sunday came.

I wonder if the disciples grew weary in the waiting. Already they experienced the resurrection of Jesus. Not yet had the promised Holy Spirit come upon them. They, too, were in the space between the already and not yet. And they, too, waited.

It’s difficult to wait. Especially when you are a little-or-more anxious over something or someone. When you feel like you have no idea what you should be doing while you wait, or you aren’t even certain you will recognize when the wait is over or what you should do when it is.

My particular wait of recent was not in an upper room. It began in an airport, then in a hospital, then a guesthouse, then airports, and now our home. The weight of a sudden medical event in my husband while in the far-from-home airport hung on my heart for several breaths like a lead apron I couldn’t get out from under. And then the Word whispered a promise into my heart-ears, “As in the beginning, I am in every new beginning. I have prepared you.”

I started breathing again, and through the ensuing days-into-weeks of doing the work of recovery with my husband as he improved and eventually met the criteria for “fit-to-fly,” I was aware of God’s Spirit hovering over our deep waters as he did in the first beginning. “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was formless and empty, and darkness covered the deep waters. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the surface of the waters.” (Genesis 1;1-2, NLT)

Formless and void. Deep waters. My reality. So many unanswered questions. A myriad of what ifs. Uncertain what exactly I was waiting for and wondering if I would recognize it when it came. Formless and void. Deep waters. Already walking with Jesus  and not yet knowing the next step. Already noting improvement in my husband and not yet back to where he once was. Waiting. Praying.

Did the disciples feel like that in their new beginning? Wondering? What if? Already sent and not yet empowered. Already promised and not yet anointed. Waiting. Praying.

We are experiencing new life. Already my husband is dramatically improved. We wait for resolution, strength, understanding. Our souls seek healing in the One who guides us in becoming more like Himself, more loving. Even in this season. Even in the waiting between already and not yet.

In this new beginning, while we wait, we pray. I pray for a fresh anointing. I pray for a new infilling. I pray that even in our frailty Holy Spirit will fall afresh on us and find us faithful. And I pray we will know when he fills, when he speaks, and when he falls afresh.

Between already and not  yet. Here we are, and it is well with our souls.

Grateful we are not alone between already and not yet,

Christine